13-Years After 9/11 – We Remember Them

Please take a moment to remember the souls we lost 13 years ago.

Kindness Blog

13-Years After 9/11 – We Remember Them

9/11 kindness

It is now Thirteen years since the devastating September 11 attacks, which killed almost 3,000 people and injured countless others.

We remember, through a selection of photographs, those that were lost and the serviceman and volunteers who rose up and showed their bravery and kindness to us all.

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 kindness

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

9/11 - We Remember Them

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“Make glorious, amazing mistakes.”

I Loved This Post On “Make Glorious, Amazing Mistakes”!!! Live and Learn is What Life is About!!!

The Daily Post

In Neil Gaiman’s now famous 2012 commencement speech at the University of the Arts, he offers some excellent advice to free us from perfectionism, imploring us to simply create — to make art — no matter what. What’s wonderful about this advice is that it applies to any creative endeavour, regardless of whether your art form is writing, drawing, painting, sculpting, or découpage:

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good…

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ACCEPTANCE

I haven’t written anything for so long because I have been all over the place with my health and emotions. I have been on a roller coaster ride holding on for dear life lately but somehow been keeping it together for the outside world, other than a couple of close friends. I hate showing weakness and vulnerability. I like to keep a positive attitude and I am very grateful for all the blessings I know I have. But lately I have been overwhelmed with life and feeling like I had nowhere to turn. I know my family is tired of me being sick, as I was reminded that it has been 6 years of illness and operations, so I know I can’t go to any of them for any support and I hate bothering people as everybody has stuff.

Why has this time been particularly challenging?? One of the bigger issues is dealing with the aftermath of my Craniotomy. I am 4 months post-op and not doing nearly as well as I had hoped for. I am still getting a lot of pain, intermittent infections and extreme fatigue. I have been down this road before, many times and after 9 operations and my hopes being lifted up and then dashed so many times, enough is enough. I can’t take it. It is what it is.

Life’s bumps and changes on the home front have been particularly challenging lately. Feeling overwhelmed has manifested into having multiple panic attacks a day a lot of the time, which have been debilitating. I have been chewing on anti-anxiety meds like they are candy. Some days are better than others thank God. So add this on top of the fibro which has been kicking my butt and my other health issues, it’s been difficult.

Unfortunately, after 4 years of being separated, there has been a lot of discord and upset with my ex-partner that has left me reeling. He is a bully and likes to be the most difficult when I am feeling really rough, kind of like kicking a dog when they are down. Certain issues were handled poorly and with the stress of everything else put me in a pretty bad way. I know I am strong but I find since this last surgery, my recovery is very slow and it doesn’t take much to set me back. So I realized I had to take control of my life back, no matter how worn out I was feeling and not let him or anyone affect me like this. So I decided to make some changes such as to not put myself in the line of fire anymore, which I only did for the sake of my daughter and take my power and self-esteem back. It’s hard when you are sick but I have to help myself because nobody else is going to do it.

The following is a list of the decisions and changes that I have made:

1) Have no interaction with my ex other than by email when we need to communicate about any issues.

2) Drop my daughter off and pick her up without going into the house and making friendly conversation….he is not my friend. I tried for my daughter, over and over. It doesn’t work.

3) Accept that it is better for my daughter to have the stability of living in one place, her dad’s house, all week while attending high school (1st year) so she has the stability and routine she needs. I am not well enough to take care of her consistently and I need to do what is best for her even if it means I have to let her go a little bit more. I only want the very best for her.

4) Accept my new normal regarding my sinus. The specialist explained to me recently that even after my Craniotomy and all the work they did in there, the extent of my disease Is that which I will never get better, but hopefully the disease will be more manageable allowing me a better quality of life at some point, but it will always remain a challenge for him and for me. I am grateful to be alive and know it could be much worse.

5) I have decided to move to lighten my financial load, have given my notice and am now looking for a smaller place that my daughter can spend weekends with me.

Accepting doesn’t mean giving up. To me it means to stop beating myself up and feeling bad about my health and the limitations it has given me, accepting where I am in my life and to lighten up on myself. I am my own worst critic and my Type ‘A’ personality is always in the background whispering to me, but my New Normal is to stop, breathe, love and accept myself the way I am and to keep moving forward, open to the beauty of life and do my best to not get stuck in the shit!! </

Thank you for listening. It means a lot to me if you dropped in and it feels good to get this out and get busy with moving forward and to continue to work on losing the fear.

Sent from my iPhone

This Man Has ALS, And His Ice Bucket Challenge Will Make You Laugh. Then It’ll Make You Cry

Please watch this ALS video, the whole video and you will see why I chose to reblog this particular video done by a very brave man, Anthony Carbajal. God Bless you and your family Anthony!

Kindness Blog

Over the last few weeks, social media has gone berserk with the #ALSIceBucketChallenge, as celebrities, tech moguls, politicians, and people everywhere grab buckets of ice water and dump them on their heads

All this is in the name of raising awareness for amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, also known as ALS or Lou Gehrig’s disease.

Anthony Carbajal

There’s been such a deluge of videos made of these ice bucket challenges (some of which have been hilarious, others more serious) that you might be tempted to skip this new video that was uploaded Monday by a man named Anthony Carbajal. But as Upworthy put it, this is one clip that “you really should see.”

The video begins humorously as Carbajal, aphotographer, dresses up in a neon bikini top and soaps up a car before being doused with ice water. “OK, that was probably the most embarrassing thing that I’ve ever done in…

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A Sentimental Scottish Tale

The Anonymous Bagpiper

witlessdatingafterfifty

The Bagpiper

(in his own words, anonymously written)

As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently, I was asked by a funeral

director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had

no family nor friends, so the service was to be at a paupers’ cemetery.

This was in the hills and back country.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and being typical

man, didn’t stop for directions.

I finally arrived, an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently

gone. The hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only diggers and

a crew left. They were sitting under a tree eating lunch.

I felt badly and apologized for being late. I went to the side of the

grave and looked down. The vault lid was in place. I didn’t know what

else to do, so I started to play.

The…

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EF FIBRO !!!!!

To all my fellow Fibromite’s out there in Fibro Land, you know the familiar saying………. ‘I Overdid It Today’??   Well, ‘I Overdid It Today’, both yesterday AND today so I am going down the Fibro Vortex to pay the price in spades tomorrow, which is now today, LOL!!   I KNOW we have to pace ourselves but man, that gets soooo boring, depressing and sometimes just plain lonely!! And at times, more often than not, I just don’t care anymore because I feel like life is passing me by!! All we want to do is just get out in the world, have some fun, interact with people and have what would be a normal day to a non-Fibromite!!   But it just shatters us…..literally!!

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I know only too well that all encompassing feeling of exhaustion and weakness that takes over our bodies and feels like we are being weighted down by a hundred pound weight and every part of us hurts!! It hurts just to try and keep your eyes open….I mean, come on!! The date with the Fibro-Devil has begun and it all started with ‘I Overdid It Today’, which was really a GREAT day filled with the excitement at feeling free and like your old self, if only for a brief time. You may go out and have a visit perhaps, a meal at a friend’s or in a restaurant where you probably chat and giggle for hours, a nice brisk walk, shopping…..you know, things we used to do pre-Fibro and not even give it a second thought!! Just a normal day!!   Doesn’t it feel amazing to have a great day like that??  You feel alive again and engaged and remember how it used to feel to shop until we dropped……only now we drop!!!   And now after going out for a fabulous dinner and chat for several hours, I find myself absolutely drained! I can literally feel the life energy draining out of me as I start to feel the exhaustion coming on.   And it’s not even what you would call a late night…..10pm is when I am heading home if I dare be so adventurous AND thinking about that, Adventurous used to be my middle name, along with Spontaneous, Ms. Moxy….. I was known for running circles around most people AND not seeing me for the dust because I never stayed in one place too long!! Hell, I drove across Canada from Calgary, Alberta to Toronto, Ontario (where I live now) by myself with my two little boys, then aged 4 & 5 years old in an Old blue Malibu. And we made it!!!  In one piece, until the engine caught on fire when I pulled into a local convenience store only one day after we had arrived. The engine started smoking, LOL, and then poof, that was the end for that car!!

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So, I hope this gives you an idea of what I was capable of BEFORE this nasty disease snuck up on me and started stealing my life away, slowly and insidiously! Eventually, we all come around after a couple of days of doing a face plant in our beds, and we start all over at square one again!! We get back into pacing ourselves until we’ve had enough again and throw caution to the wind!! And then those famous last words come back to haunt us,’I Overdid It Today’. Well guess what Fibro-Devil, you are not getting all of me, not even half of me, even though you try!! I will lay down, do my time and then get right back up again. Do you hear me and do you hear all the other Fibromite’s?? We will continue to do this because we are STRONG, that’s why!!!

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As Israel commits Genocide, love shows the way – Social media campaign goes viral – #JewsAndArabsRefuseToBeEnemies

BEAUTIFUL…..#JewsAndArabsRefuseToBeEnemies
Bring it on!!!!

Living to help other disabled people, and people in need, Change the sign!! And Earth

Hate can stop, it stopped here, 2 kids. No hateHate can stop, it stopped here, 2 kids. No hate

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, HELP ME MAKE THIS GO VIRAL!!! ISRAEL HATE, THESE PEOPLE LOVE, INSPITE THE HATE THEY SEE AND HEAR 

As the Israeli operation Protective Edge has so far claimed over 1,000 dead, users have been flooding the web with dozens of photos of Jews and Arabs together showcasing peace and love, under the hashtag #JewsAndArabsRefuseToBeEnemies. Israel, Hamas agree to 12-hour pause in Gaza hostilities The campaign was launched by Abraham Gutman (Jewish) and Dania Darwish (Arab), both students at Hunter College in New York, immediately after the start of Operation Protective Edge in Gaza – and this week it gained momentum. “For me, it is hard to watch the current escalation between Israel and Gaza from afar. I wanted to find a way to be more than a passenger, to do something about it rather than just watch the news…

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National Mourning Day.

petitemagique

IMG_1114547268207644

May their souls rest in peace

May their loved ones find strength

May this never happen again…

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GIRLFRIENDS

I decided to blog about what I am grateful for as I sit here on a Saturday night.  It’s just after 11pm and I have just gotten home from dinner with 3 of the best friend’s a girl could have.  I have another dear friend that wasn’t there tonight that I have known since the age of 9, which is Grade 4, so I include her heart and spirit when talking about how blessed I am to have this amazing group of women in my life.

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We were celebrating a July and August birthday, something we have been doing as a foursome since our 40’s, however we have known each other since our early teens!!!  We went to high school together, partied our asses off together and lived to tell the tales, LOL, watched our kids grow up, been through marriages, divorces, remarriages, graduations, our children’s weddings and welcomed the first grandchild amongst us whom I love and adore like crazy!  We have been there through sickness, health, cancer, chronic illness, deaths, multiple operations, travelled together abroad and at home, shopped ’till we dropped, laughed until we peed our pants or our faces hurt, ate until we could eat no more……I think you get the picture!!!  We have grown from teenagers into women and navigated our way through life together up to this point and we know we have a sisterhood bond until the day we leave this earth.   I can’t imagine not having these beautiful, amazing women in my life and am so grateful, so I ask how lucky am I??

Very, very lucky because being chronically ill as I am, friends leave, families leave, husbands leave…..like mine.  You hear from these ‘friends’ less and less as your  ability to make a commitment a lot of times is hampered because of your health and the last minute cancellations are only tolerated for so long and then the calls and invites slowly stop coming in.   I have really felt this over the past five years since becoming quite ill and as much as I try not to judge, try to understand, it still hurts, a lot.  So through this experience and reading a book “The Four Agreements” written by Miguel Ruiz, I have learned that I can’t take it personally and to focus on what I HAVE which are these amazing girlfriends who have shown me through their love, laughter and unwavering loyalty that they aren’t going anywhere!!!  Thank you ladies for being there for me and continuing to be there during one of the most difficult times in my life!!!!!   I love you all and look forward to continuing on our journey together and making wonderful memories and laughing so hard we roll around on the floor clenching our bellies!!  😀

 

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Trying to Find My Rhythm and My Daughter’s Peanut Allergy

I haven’t blogged for a few weeks at least! What can I say, life has gotten in the way!!  I am progressing with my Craniotomy recovery but I liken it to a roller coaster ride!  Just when I think I am starting to turn the corner, I get all excited and act like there is absolutely nothing wrong with me, yeah right, lol, and max out my day like it’s my last!  So my specialists said I have to find a baseline and a routine.  Well, let me tell you that routine and Sagittarius people don’t go very well together, and just when I do start to get one going, life throws you a curve ball!  Now, I like curve balls because I get bored really easy if I am feeling somewhat human but too many curveballs in a row, take me down, big time.  Then I crash and all I can do is stay in bed and sleep and sleep and sleep.  That’s why I have been slow to blog lately as I have disappeared into my bed just to come up for bathroom breaks and some air for a few days at a time at least once or twice a week!  It’s been a bit of a rough go lately.  My neurologist said I will start getting some stamina back at the 4-5 month mark which I am praying happens!!  I just wonder how much of my fibromyalgia will keep me down.  I am always hurting, whether it’s my head or my whole body from the fibro which is kicking my ass a bit right now.

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But all that being said, the highlight of the past few weeks has been getting my daughter ready to graduate and then watching my baby girl graduate from Grade 8 last Monday night.  She was so beautiful and excited and her big brother’s came out to be there for her too.  Emotionally I was a wreck but kept it together except for some tears as I watched my last baby move on to the next adventure in her life.  High school now, whoa…..I hope she doesn’t do a quarter of what I did!!  Please God!!!  I always excelled academically without much effort but was a social butterfly and loved to have a good time.  My beautiful daughter is herself much the same as her mom, but must work much harder academically than I had too which sucks for her.  She is a visual learner, gets bored to death in most classes where she has to sit and listen and can hardly wait to exit and move about, loves photography, takes acting classes and film classes outside of school which she loves and excels in.  She has a good head on her shoulders, however I know it will be a huge transition starting high school, especially when she is going from a public school of 300 kids to a school with 3,000 kids.  Now that’s quite a leap and she has already told me she is looking forward to making new friends which she does well, but believe you me, I will have my eagle eye’s on her!!  It is a whole new world out there, but I am so grateful for her 2 older brother’s who will be there for her in this constantly fast changing world.

Oh and one other issue, she has a Life Threatening Peanut Allergy which she is extremely diligent with, has been educated thoroughly about and since being diagnosed at 9 months, knows nothing different.  She has a great attitude and will not eat anything that she has even a smidgen of doubt about what is in it and will look up ingredients on Google if she comes across something new.  She recently went on her Grade 8 graduation trip to Quebec City, took her own snacks and lost some weight because she turned down so many food items.  She was kind of starving when she got home and ate non-stop for the first couple of days!!  But I must admit I am terrified because she is going from a peanut free school to high school which isn’t officially peanut free.  So as aware as she is, she will have to become even more aware as the world is not peanut free.  Hugs, xo

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